12 Angry Men - Michael

12 Angry Men

We begin our adventure with a classic movie from 1957. This is one of those movies you should feel guilty for not seeing, even if you weren't old enough to serve on a jury in '57. Excepting a brief introduction, the whole movie takes place in one room (and accompanying bathroom). It seems like the Mens room got a little crowded a few times, but no one thought to use the Womens room, despite the fact that, as the title of the movie hints, it sits empty the whole time.

Evidence has come a long way from this to CSI. Apparently you can just ask for the murder knife, get your fingerprints all over it, and stab it into a table. Really, the movie felt a lot more like a mystery show that your average Law & Order courtroom. The defense lawyer was sleeping on the job, and the investigators were either incompetent, or out for blood. Within a few mintues of discussion at deliberation, they completely discredit the one piece of evidence and two witnesses that made up the case.

What are the takeaways from this movie? Reasonable doubt is a tricky thing. The oldest man in a room is the wisest. There will always be backroom deals, even if that room is a bathroom. It only takes one persistent man to topple a house of cards. The fact that our justice system ultimately hinges on 12 people with their own lives, hopes and fears (and ballgame tickets) is both a triumph and a terror. If you're on trial for murder, try to get Henry Fonda on your jury.

By the Numbers:
# of Truly Angry Men: 3
# of Sometimes Irritated Men: 8
# of Unflappably Cool Men: 1
# of Lying Witnesses to (Almost) Send a Boy to the Chair: 2
# of Women: 0
# of Revelations That Should Have Happened Well Before Trial: 5
# of Bigoted Hate Speeches About Poor People: 1
# of People Who Are Sent To the Kids Table After Their Hate Speech: 1
# of Times To Punch Your Father To Become A Real Man: 1
Chance A Guilty Man Was Released To Kill Again: 30%
Chance Of "Oceans 12"-like Sequel Numbering: 13%
Chance That the Defence Lawyer Was Technically Dead: 85%
Chance That Someone Like Juror 8 Will Stick Up For You: 0.01%

Rating (without alcohol): 4 Stars
Rating (with alcohol): 4 1/2 Stars

- Michael

Welcome!

Welcome to 1001 Inebriated Nights, where good movies meet not-so-good wine. Take one copy of 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die, add Netflix, and plenty of cheap drinks, and this is what you get. We’ll be providing impressions, summaries, and aimless, rambling reviews of the movies we watch. Rather than give a lot of info about Brandy and I up front, we’ll just let embarrassing personal details slip out in the following posts. So, with a long list, and a distinct lack of taste in both cinema and beverages, we begin…